It doesn't look like much, but it's been a battle for a long time.
On one side, there was me: nice guy, makes films, likes to laugh.
On the other, there was my professional persona: managing director of a production company looking for clients.
So I had two websites. One of which I could barely create content for (the professional one).
For a long time, I kept telling myself: "if only I could bring all of this together and just be one person!" Trust me, I tried.
But every time, the same fear caught up with me:
What if my corporate clients stumble on one of my jokes? Or one of my posts about meditation? What will they think?
Every time, I'd comb through my personal posts looking for the one that might scare off a "serious client." So I stayed paralysed.
Recently, it even went up a notch:
I do narrative strategy now – and it's going very well, thank you. So I had THREE websites. And every social media account was doubled: professional and personal.
I could tell things were blending: my professional clients would mention some of my personal videos – positively! And some people who followed my beatnik videos were asking for consulting.
The last straw:
A LinkedIn message from a stranger I'd just connected with. Cold outreach. So insincere, so artificial, so transparent in its attempt at "I'm pretending to be interested but actually I have something to sell" that... it made me furious.
I refuse to deal with that kind of crap. I don't want that slimy obsequiousness in my daily life. I'd rather have fewer clients, less success, less of everything, but... not that.
Besides, I can't keep writing about alignment in articles and videos and then go hide behind my role as a company director when it comes to my own work. So:
- I removed that guy from my contacts
- I wanted to quit LinkedIn (not yet, but maybe soon.)
- but above all:
I spent a week moving the content from my professional websites onto my personal site. The only filter: do I like this post? Is it sincere? Could it resonate with someone? And never again: what will the COO of XYZ think?
The fact is: this work started a while ago.
Since I've been doing narrative strategy, my clients are people who are like me. People I get along with. People around whom I'm myself, and they are too.
So there's no longer any need to pretend.
Or rather: I'm going to organise my life so that there's no longer any need to pretend.
Because at some point, it's a choice.
And if you're curious, feel free to stop by the Boulengerie. (dot com)